This is not only for mother but both as parents

parentsYou have a very great desire to be a mother. So be. But be knowing that you are taking on a great responsibility. To become a mother is one of the greatest responsibilities in the world. So many people are on the psychiatrists? couches, and so many people are in madhouses, and so many are out of the madhouses. If you go deep into the neurosis of humanity, you will always find the mother - because so many women want to be mothers but they don?t know how to be. Once the relationship between the mother and the child goes wrong, the child?s whole life goes wrong - because that is his first contact with the world, his first relationship. Everything else will be in continuity with it. And if the first step goes wrong, the whole life goes wrong. The desire is there - I can feel it... a tremendous desire to be a mother. Nothing is wrong in it, but one should knowingly become a mother. You are taking one of the greatest responsibilities that a human being can take. Men are a little freer in that way - because they cannot take the responsibility of becoming a mother. Women have more responsibility. So become a mother, but don?t take it for granted that just by being a woman, one is necessarily a mother - that is a fallacy. Motherhood is a great art; you have to learn it. So start learning about it! A few things I would like to say to you:

Never treat the child as yours; never possess the child. It comes through you, but it is not yours. God has only used you as a vehicle, a medium - but the child is not your possession. Love, but never possess the child. IF the mother starts possessing the child, then the life is destroyed - the child starts becoming a prisoner. You are destroying his personality, and you are reducing him to a thing. Only a thing can be possessed: a house can be possessed, a car can be possessed - never a person. So this is the first lesson - get ready for it. Before the child comes, you should be able to greet him as an independent being, as a person in his own right, not just your child.
And the second thing...
Treat the child as you would treat a grown-up person. Never treat a child like a child. Treat the child with deep respect. God has chosen you to be a host. God has entered into your being as a guest. The child is very fragile, helpless. It is very difficult to respect the child. It is very easy to humiliate the child. Humiliation comes very easy - because the child is helpless and cannot do anything, cannot retaliate, cannot react. Treat the child as a grown-up, and with great respect. Once you respect the child, you don?t try to impose your ideas on him. You don?t try to impose anything on the child. You simply give him the freedom - freedom to explore the world. You help him to become more and more powerful in exploring the world - but you never give him directions. You give him energy, you give him protection, you give him security, all that he needs - but you help him to go farther away from you to explore the world. And, of course, in freedom the wrong is also included. It is very difficult for a mother to learn that when you give freedom to a child, it is not freedom only to do good. It is also necessarily the freedom to do bad, to do wrong. So make the child alert, intelligent, but never give him any commandments - nobody keeps them, and people become hypocrites. So if you really love the child, the one thing has to be remembered: never, never help him in any way, force him in any way, to become a hypocrite.
And the third thing...
Don?t listen to the morality, don?t listen to religion, don?t listen to culture - listen to nature. Whatsoever is natural is good - even if sometimes it is very difficult for you, very uncomfortable for you. Because you have been not brought up according to nature. Your parents were not bringing you up with real art, love. It was just an accidental thing. Don?t repeat the same mistakes. Many times you will feel very uneasy... ~ Walk without Feet, Fly without Wings and Think without Mind.

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